Thursday, May 29, 2014
Click here to order: www.cantkeepasobergirldown.com
We might just have very similar stories. ;)
In my past I had a crush on codependency. Today, I crush it!
I think of my life like this: B.D. (Before Divorce) and A.D. (After Divorce).
After my divorce at the age of 29, I became a bit obsessed with the idea of falling in love again. I began using men as my codependent scratching post so I didn't have to feel the loss of my marriage, for it had been years since I had experienced singledom and I did not want to be alone. I desired so desperately to succumb to the comfortable numbness inside a veil of fantasy love. Though after enduring my own neurotic behavior of begging men to stay after they had promised to love me forever, losing a baby on a bitterly cold, Minnesota New Year's Eve morning and experiencing a massive amount of pain and depression -I woke up.
I rode my motorcycle in the country -yelling at God. I battled tides of the ocean on a bodyboard -yelling at God. I traveled across the country in my convertible -yelling at God. I even took off on a sea-doo into the sunset -yelling at God! Finally when I starting asking questions and paying attention to my own part in everything, I had what many call a spiritual experience. BAM! To the graveled pavement my knees fell. Little had I know until this very moment that it was me -not God, or even men. I was the one responsible for my own unhappiness and oh how difficult that was to digest!
This book is filled with my own experiences, faith, hope and understandings of how I started the journey of self-love, what happened and how I continue to Crush Codependency! Love is not supposed to hurt or break you. It's meant to uplift, fill and fuel!